The Result of Amie Sitting in a Tent
by ronnies gurl
Summary: I wrote this while sitting in a tent. It is AU and is just meant to be pointless. You might get a laugh out of it. I don't know. There are a few pairings, including slash and incest, although no detail AT ALL. It is merely just indicated. ENJOY!


The Result of Amie Sitting in a Tent...

Hermione was grinding with Voldermort, Harry with Neville, Ron with Ginny, Fred with Lucius, and George with Dumbledore. (Snape was just walking around dancing at random with the couples.  
  
They were having a party to celebrate the successful cloning of a flobberworm.  
  
The music that was blaring out a soft and gentle rap quite suddenly changed to ocean sounds, which led to everyone practicing their ballet moves.  
  
Ron was suddenly thrown gracefully into the air by Ginny. He came back down while trying to sing opera.  
  
"Jiiiinglllllllllle beeeeeeeeells. I aaaaaaaaaaaam goooooooood!" He finished his little performance after demanding that everyone clap for him.  
  
Ron was shoved roughly off the appointed 'stage' section of the floor by Dumbledore.  
  
Dumbledore snapped his fingers and was seen wearing black, white and red. Just like a mime. He put on an emotionless expression and started acting like he was trapped in a box. Lucius, who was standing directly in front of Harry, bent over from laughter.  
  
Dumbledore saw this and gave Harry the middle finger while adapting a look of hatred.  
  
Harry found this all rather sexy, and started walking towards Dumbledore while moving his hips back and forth seductively.  
  
"You work that leather sexy man!" Shouted an innocent bystander who was killed by the glares of the trash can.  
  
Harry finally reached Dumbledore and was transfigured into a frog.  
  
"Ribbit!" said Harry, which translated to "Oh. My. God. What plans does he have fore me?! Shall I be chained to a bed and seduced? Or perhaps lathered in chocolate..." in English.  
  
Ginny, who had been one of the many to watch this little display, was turned on. She reached behind herself and grabbed the first person she felt behind her (turned out to be Fred). She pulled him after her by his tie. The two walked away and were never seen again.  
  
Ron saw this, and felt left out. He grabbed Snape and the two ran away giggling like little school girls. They nearly stepped on a baby hippo, but caught themselves, adopted it, and named it Pillow.  
  
Lucius sneered at everyone and looked away at Dumbledore who was slinking away while shoving a frog down his pants...  
  
He turned back to the others who were all doing some Russian Jig.  
  
"What a bunch of Nincompoops." He spat while looking Hermione up and down.  
  
She smiled at him and said, "Hello! I'm Hermione Granger. And you must be... a woman?"  
  
"Naturally." He/she replied. "I'm Lucius Malfoy. Would you like to go and do some research in a random town library? We can look up skunk boggarts/hinkeypuffs!"  
  
"Sure!" Exclaimed Hermione. "Let's just go to my house first so I can ask my mummy."  
  
"Alright! Can we have some cookies and mild too?"  
  
"Well duh!"  
  
Lucius and Hermione started skipping away, arms linked, heading towards the end of the rainbow. Unfortunately, they were swallowed whole by a bottomless pit.  
  
George, Neville and Voldermort, the only three left, looked around finally noticing they were the only ones left. They made eye contact, grinned, and started in on some passionate love making.  
  
No one noticed as a pale, blonde boy named Draco walked past... completely starkers.  
  
"Bloody shoddy." He mumbled. "No one left for me." The blonde boy then sat down on a rock and started to cry.

THE END!  
  
Wow... I laughed my butt off as writing this. I was in a tent last night with my friend, and was in the weirdest mood ever! Ah well! I just decided to post this because I thought it might get some laughs. Please review and let me know if it was any good (in a weird messed up kinda way) and yes, I know. Everyone is COMPLETELY out of character.  
  
Thanks to Nikki for being my beta, and for giving me the word "Nincompoop." Lmfao.  
  
J K Rowling owns all characters, but the ideas are ALL mine! XD  
  
--Amie


End file.
